Designation: BML-20XX

dickpunch69:

NO WINDOWS I JUST WANT TO FORCE QUIT A PROGRAM DONT TRY TO LOOK FOR A SOLUTION ACCEPT DEATH AND FACE OBLIVION

siderealscion:

mALEFISHIENT, MARK

ive been meaning to make work-related comics forever, so enjoy some choice movie title bastardizations.

(these all actually, seriously, happened, with no humor or awareness on the part of the customer at the time as far as I could tell. so, yes, someone actually asked for a ticket to “Detergent” with a straight face.)

Okay, story time.

I used to work in a movie theatre, not selling the tickets, but selling overpriced crap then cleaning it out from under all the seats. Anyway, that’s a different story. Today’s story is about the movie Zack and Miri Make a Porno. Long title for a movie, right? That’s what our electronic tickers thought, too, so they shortened it. Also, the rating for each movie is displayed at the end of the title on the ticker. This movie was obviously rated R, right? Well, combined, these factors resulted in the movie being displayed as “Zack and Miri make a PR” on all of our tickers.

Kinda looks like a movie with a long title and a PG rating if you have bad eyesight or generally don’t pay attention to shit. The elderly in my area are notorious for both. We had an elderly couple come in on a quiet Sunday to take in a movie. No real agenda, as things turned out, they didn’t have anything in particular they wanted to see, just taking in a movie on a Sunday. A PG movie. Apparently, Zack and Miri make a Porno is not a PG rated movie, and they let our ticket sellers know about it.

shithowdy:

Fun fact: if you approach an employee and insist that they go ‘check the back’ for an item that’s not on the shelf, there is a 90% chance that they’ll go to the back room, scratch their ass and check their text messages for five minutes, and come back out with a sympathetic smile and a ‘Sorry!’ because they know without even looking that the stock isn’t there.

shithowdy:

Fun fact: if you approach an employee and insist that they go ‘check the back’ for an item that’s not on the shelf, there is a 90% chance that they’ll go to the back room, scratch their ass and check their text messages for five minutes, and come back out with a sympathetic smile and a ‘Sorry!’ because they know without even looking that the stock isn’t there.

deliciousghosts:

I Have No Plot But I Know Which Groceries These Characters Would Buy: A Tale of Misplaced Priorities

candrawithlove:

I think I need to stop doing what I’m doing…

dailybunny:

Bunny Pokes Her Head Through the Blinds to Look Out the Window
Thanks, Aileen, Nick and bunny Ivy!
sariagray:

ultrafacts:

Source For more facts follow Ultrafacts

I looked at this and then thought “Okay, but what’s the formula?”
And then I laughed at myself.

sariagray:

ultrafacts:

Source For more facts follow Ultrafacts

I looked at this and then thought “Okay, but what’s the formula?”

And then I laughed at myself.

While no one should expect stuff to go wrong, never hurts to prepare for it!
3squirrels:

death-limes:

fatass-mcnotits:

theidealisticcynic:

nudityandnerdery:

It’s unfortunate how many people didn’t take this message away from the debate.

Bill Nye was just SO ENTHUSIASTIC about the topic. You could tell.
For God’s sake, the man was trying to teach people about photosynthesis when asked what his favourite colour was. That’s a man that ADORES science and absolutely loves teaching people.
Suddenly, I was 12 and watching a Bill Nye The Science Guy episode at my grandma’s school while she was decorating the gym.

Bill Nye is like the Mister Roger’s of science
he legitimately cares about what he is talking about and enthusiastically encourages people to take something positive away from it

Bill Nye is the Mister Rogers of science
Bob Ross is the Mister Rogers of art
and Mister Rogers is… well, Mister Rogers
what if they could join forces

3squirrels:

death-limes:

fatass-mcnotits:

theidealisticcynic:

nudityandnerdery:

It’s unfortunate how many people didn’t take this message away from the debate.

Bill Nye was just SO ENTHUSIASTIC about the topic. You could tell.

For God’s sake, the man was trying to teach people about photosynthesis when asked what his favourite colour was. That’s a man that ADORES science and absolutely loves teaching people.

Suddenly, I was 12 and watching a Bill Nye The Science Guy episode at my grandma’s school while she was decorating the gym.

Bill Nye is like the Mister Roger’s of science

he legitimately cares about what he is talking about and enthusiastically encourages people to take something positive away from it

Bill Nye is the Mister Rogers of science

Bob Ross is the Mister Rogers of art

and Mister Rogers is… well, Mister Rogers

what if they could join forces

image